SpaceJam.com

Posted: June 6th, 2021

I love Geocities and Angelfire... obviously. I mean, that's kinda what this site evolved out of. So I wanted to start doing this thing where I hunt down cool websites that maybe got forgotten or lost in the shuffle and induct them into the hall of immortality that is some weird goth chick's website. Fuck yeah.

So considering all that, I'm gonna immediately betray my own vision and go corporate. It's time to check out Space Jam's official website from 1996.

1996 was a great year for me. Crying, shitting my pants. Nothing's changed to this day. Plus there's a new one coming out! Yeah with uh... Lebron James? I think? I dunno. One of those basketball dudes.

...I don't like sports.

Let's slam dunk this bitch into the C O O N Z O N E. Racc attack bitches!

I'm tired.

Jay Z-zus renegading Christ. You thought white backgrounds were hard on the eyes? How about one redder than a slut's buttcheeks? Good lord. It matches the color of the blood pouring out of my eyes. I feel like I had a miscarriage and I wasn't even pregnant.

If I had a child I'd throw a brick at his head in the blind rage this god awful atrocity of web design has brought upon my weak soul.

Use dark backgrounds you motherfuckers. There's no excuse for this.

I'm not even exploring the rest of this site. The Space Jam should get sucked into a black hole.

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