Blink of an Eye
Date: September 4th, 2019
Written by: Majin Tween
I love watching Michael Pare movies because he's Eddie Wilson and Joe West. But in this movie he's camoflauge paintball man.
Now, the last Michael Pare movie that wasn't Eddie and the Cruisers I watched I had to see his big, muscular clenching ass as he missionary position'd some girl in a scene.
That's all I remember from that movie, and I'm hoping I don't see Eddie's ass again.
The movie is basically about this girl's parents having a dream or something that she's gonna get killed by terrorists, so Michael fuckin' Pare has to protect her. She doesn't believe he's in danger, but after shutting his eyes for a few seconds and witnessing a montage of bad things happening to this girl in his mind, he decides that they're right and they need to get the fuck outta town. But this bitch wants nothing to do with Michael Pare.
Nobody believes that Eddie Wilson has psychic abilities, even when he says "I'm not from around here." Dude, when someone says that shit you gotta believe they've got superpowers. But hey, my opinions are a bit off color because I'm not from around here.
When they actually showed up and killed a shitload of people (including a small child), the girl was finally like "ok u were right my bad." Fucking women, right?
When she eventually starts believing his bullshit, she asks "...who are you, Sam Browning?" Which I thought was stupid because she answered her own question. He's Sam Browning. Fucking moron.
She asks "You're a psychic, aren't you?" He goes "Yeah, but everyone is. I just worked harder at honing it."
The action scenes take me back to when I'd visit my grandparents. My grandpa would always be watching these fucking action movies (war, westerns, etc.) and whenever the gun violence would start happening it would be so cripplingly loud that nobody in the house could talk over it. So loud-ass gunfire is kind of nostalgic to me. Kinda warped but it's not real gunfire so who gives a shit.
I liked the ending of the movie, which I won't spoil because I think you should go pick up the tape and pop it in your VCR. It's a good movie.
All in all, this movie's not bad at all. Keep in mind that with all things I "review" on here, I seem to be better at just enjoying things than your common normie.
So while there are plenty of reviews online calling this movie shitty, I don't compare everything to Breaking Bad or Citizen Kane. It's a fun little movie that's worth watching at least once if you like action movies with silly plots. It's not amazing, but it's not bad either.
Plus, Citizen Kane fucking sucks.
It was Kane's worst gimmick. Bar none.