Date: December 27th, 2023

I've been watching a shitload of Reba lately. Just marathonning the fuck outta some Reebs. I can honestly say I know more about Reba's lore than I know about any literal human being I've ever met in my life.

But in the smoke of the Rebaverse, another thing I've been introduced to is The Hammer--- a movie starring Reba.

She's a judge, she's in like Texas or some shit. It's a murder mystery gimmick. Blah blah. Nah. You wanna know why I'm jotting down thoughts on this bullshit right now?

Because-- they got fucking Melissa Peterman in there as her sister.

Like... that's Barbara Jean. True Rebamaniacs know that. Reba hates that burp-slurping bimbo. And rightfully so! She swooped in, stole Brock's cock, moved in across the street and then tried to be Reba's best friend. That shit's not cool at all. But now you want me to watch this shit and be like "oh they're different people now." Fuck off. That's not how life works. Cope, libtard.

Plus every time they gotta go to commercial, because this is a made-for-TV movie, someone will say something all dramatic, and then it'll zoom in on Reba's face making the most befuddling fucking expression I've ever seen. I don't know what emotion she's ever conveying, but it's like six different emojis got mashed together and she tried to do an impression of it.

It's a fun movie. Totally recommend it.