E.T.

Date: October 20th, 2021

I am an oppressed minority: what people still ignorantly call "a comedian." Fucking horrible. We are Laughrican Americans.

LGBT stands for Laughter, Giggles, Bahahaha and Teehee.

...I'm a fucking dyke.

Anyway. Speaking of oppressed minorities: ALIENS! And Katy Perry wants to fuck one.

Yeah. In her hit song ET she sings about wanting to get railed by an extra testicle.

She sings about how the alien from another world is all different and shit and it gets her panties all moisturized like a cracked bottle of lotion getting Goose-stepped by Hitler. Which would quack me up even though I footed the bill on it. Should have ducked if you didn't wanna get stepped on, bitch. It's my fault, and that's a mallard of fact.

Like legit, she just sings about people not understanding the alien and wanting to shove coke bottles and altoids up it's ass or whatever. It's a story of humanity's bigotry towards those who are different and her wanting to get green cum all over her like an episode of You Can't Do That On Television.

I have a working theory that this song was originally about the wife of a slave owner founding Blacked, but I can't confirm that yet.

I dunno about all this "no one understands you" business. Can't relate. Everyone gets me. I'm an open book. The genuine article. The real mccoy. This alien guy sounds like a real jerk. I don't go for this mysterious stranger business. You gotta start makin' sense, kid. Get yourself some surgery so your eyes look more human, bleach your skin and get a job working at Burger King and make me some french toast sticks you freeloading parasite. Fuck you. ,/p>

Sorry. I got so stressed that I fucked up my P tags. But I think Katy would let this alien tag her with his pee.

Sick of these aliens coming down to our planet from the Urethra Galaxy and stealing our jobs. Give me some space if you want me to ship you and Katy Perry, because I'm hating how very scary the image of you two having a fuck is in my head.

Alright. I'm stretching this out. There's not a lot to say about this song. Go find an alien and blow it or whatever.