Pokemorons

Date: October 14th, 2021

For some reason, people obsessively dislike things. They'll dedicate their life to creating websites about shit they don't like just because "haha Pokeyman SUCKS!"

I have found a website that is exactly this. It's called Pokemorons!

It hasn't been updated since 2000, so you know it's a good site.

A lot of this site is sadly broken, but I found an entire page of original drawings they did on the site so I said "FUCK IT!" and threw my vintage Burger King collector's Pokeball through the fucking wall.

So let's deep dive into this glorious website's original artwork!

Oh, darn. This is Thanksgiving themed and it's still October. I fucked up. I'm so cancelled. I'm sorry.

I love that everyone in this picture seems alright with Ash having a mental breakdown about his best friend being turned into food, but then you've got Squirtle just salivating. Like "yeah man. Let's eat." What a fucking sociopath. I love it.

Misty seems so happy again. Me? I'm a little misty eyed. That was a joke just in case you missed the point. But anyway, is every picture going to be about Pokemon getting eaten? What about the readers of humanRaCcoOn who have eating disoders!? I can't just shove food in their face like that! God!

I would imagine after the PTSD of watching your best friend get eaten, you'd turn to alcohol too. So nobody can blame Ash for his newfound addiction. He deserves our support in these trying times.

Oh come on, man. That ain't right. Your bulba's gonna be sore. :(

He's gonna need medicinal marijauna to stifle the pain of being used as a tetherball.

Damn. Really tethered those pics together.

You know what we need more of? Murder puns.

Or maybe we need to travel back in time and see what Pokemon were like back in Prehistoric times.

Damn. So that's what it was like back then? But what about later on when civilization was born and humanity evolved?

Holy shit.

Whoever made this site is a genius.

But wait... how did we get here? Can we travel back a little further and see Jesus times?

Okay, the timeline isn't making sense now. If Pokemon weren't allowed on the arc, how do we have them now? Checkmate, Christians.

According to this site, Pikachu is just as bad as Hitler. So maybe we shouldn't have let them on the arc after all.

It's a harsh reality, but we gotta face facts. Facts over feelings, libtards.

But let's be honest, folks. This entry is on life support.

So fuck it. Let's perform an autopsy and get outta here.