Have you ever been so hated in your work environment for -no reason- that your entire life falls apart?
That's where I'm at.
You see, despite the fact that I could absolutely qualify for disability if I applied for it, I didn't want to do that. I wanted to prove that I could go through working these shitty jobs that are out there, use it to support myself while I try to get my foot in the door of successfully making money in creative endeavors (which is my life's goal).
I do whatever I'm told to at work, always perform it to the best of my abilities and have dealt with some absolute horse shit since I've gotten here.
See, this diner is severely understaffed at all times. I'm only supposed to be a waitress/dishwasher/cleaner of the place. That was it. But that's not how it actually works. I also have to make people's food, run the cash register, do customer service shit both in person and over the phone and tons of other shit. Plus, because I work at night, the morning crew dumps everything they don't want to do on me and then gets pissy if they find even a hair out of place.
No joke: I had the entire store looking spotless, I got out an hour and a half late (which is very common), and the next day they were stomping around angry because they found a single plastic straw wrapper under a table that I didn't see when I was sweeping because IT'S FUCKING TRANSPARENT AND IT WAS DARK.
I know you're probably reading this and thinking "oh you're exaggerating. You probably aren't as good of a worker as you claim. They have every right to be upset." But you're fucking wrong. It has nothing to do with that. These people legitimately get paid $4 more an hour than I do, but do way less work than I do and get mad at anyone else if they have to do shit.
The manager just walks around pretending to do shit while whoever she's with has to pick up all the slack of what she's not doing (I know from experience as I've worked with her countless times.) and the assistant manager calls out nearly every fucking day, and even when she does show up she just leaves the second someone else comes in. Everyone else will stay longer to make sure things are caught up, including myself, but she won't. Never.
So despite the fact that I get paid less than them, they want me to work about three times as hard as either of them do. And they're always looking for ways to fuck me over.
No joke, nearly every employee they've hired since I've started here has made a comment about how they "treat me like shit for no reason" and how I need to get out of this job and find somewhere else to work.
I wish it were that easy.
An employee here actually even called up the owners at their house and asked "...why did you white out so many of Sarah's days? She's the hardest worker here, and you guys treat her like garbage."
The owner's response? "She's lucky to work here at all."
So it doesn't matter how hard I work, or the fact that I've worked literally weeks in a row of opening the store, then closing the store, then opening, etc. because they can't maintain a staff worth a fuck. I'd come in whenever they'd call, no matter what was going on in my life, because I needed the money badly. Still do. I'm poor. But it's never good enough. They don't want to like me, so they choose not to.
Well, I decided I need to fix this problem because I can't even pay my rent like this. The only thing saving me right now is the money that I have saved up, which I didn't want to dip into at all. But now I'm watching it drain because people just decided that I'm a piece of shit and I don't deserve to be alive.
I went on a two week phone tag game with the grocery store across the street. I was like "eh fuck it. I'll stock shelves while I write Human Raccoon content on my phone." It seemed perfect. The money was good, and they said they were hiring. But every time I tried to get a hold of the manager, even after being told by other people "yeah we definitely need to get more employees in here", I couldn't get a hold of anyone who would actually help me. The most I got were employees who sounded depressed, said they'd "tell the manager to call me" and then clearly never did.
So I tried another restaurant, using my credentials and actually got an over the phone interview. She said "can you be here for orientation on Sunday at 11am?" I said "Absolutely."
So I got a ride there since I don't have a car or a license, only to find out that the orientation wasn't actually happening. The employee I asked about it looked at me like I was insane.
So I drove back, texted the manager asking what happened, and she said "Oh we're not doing the orientation yet. I was just asking if you'd be available."
So anyway. A few more days go by, and I get contacted about going to the actual orientation for employees... which was an hour drive away.
I had to deal with getting bitched at the entire car ride because of how much of an inconvenience it was, and then when I finally got there I wasn't allowed to stay for more than a minute because I didn't have my ID.
See, I gave a homeless man my jacket to use as a blanket because his pile of blankets were sopping wet. What I didn't realize is that my ID was in my pocket, and then the next day he got screamed at by one of the employees for "being rude" and so he disappeared into the night and I never got it back. I have to wait until March to get a new one.
So I had to text this corporate dude a picture of my ID (which I fortunately still had), my birth certificate and my social security number. I fucking hate giving out my information to anybody, so this made me massively uncomfortable.
He never responded after I submitted the stuff, and even though he gave me all the uniform shit I need and told me to text the manager of the store I'd be working at (who I'd been in talks with already), I never got a reply back and I sent that shit in three days ago.
I'm tired. I'm frustrated. I'm fucking pissed. I feel like there's nothing I can do to turn my dogshit life around and it's about to absolutely crumble.
But there is good news:
I still have my job with the abusive fucks who don't give a shit if I can pay my rent or buy food.