It's Wednesday night! You know what that FUCKING means!
It means it's NATIONAL COWBOY SHIT DAY. Holy FUCK!
Yeah! Because Adam Page won the AEW Championship at Full Gear, it's now Cowboy Shit Day. I'm with it. I'm all gussied up and ready to milk some cowboys or whatever.
"Hangman" Adam Page was having his championship celebration in the ring, when Bryan Danielson came out and was like "ay man. nah." and started acted like a fuckin' asshole. Then he fuckin' murdered Evil Uno. This brother got his shit super smashed in... then Tony Schiavone says "testy" and I giggled because that means nut sack.
"Stone Cold" Eddie Kingston is finally working with Daniel Garcia, so finally Eddie has made it. He's been wasting his time with Bryan Danielson and CM Punk. He needs to move onto a real star, like Daniel Garcia, the man who got those two over in the first place.
As Butcher and Blade waltz out, I feel a deep need for The Bunny to spit in my mouth. But then Orange Cassidy and some hispanic gu,
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That was legitimately me passing out in the middle of typing from drinking three jack and cokes in a row.
So uh... I passed out and the show's over. Hmph.
I gotta go figure out what I missed. Let me go look at AEW's YouTube channel. This is ridiculous.
...all they've uploaded is that Hangman / Danielson thing. What the fuck.
Is that all that happened? It's a two hour show! God damn it.
This would be a lot easier if I had a Twitter still and could check the trending hashtags. Fuck.
Oh. Apparently CM Punk confronted MJF. That's cool. I'd do a write up about the epic confrontation, but all Punk did was ignore MJF's handshake and walk away while the crowd goes "OOOOOO" and Cult of Personality hits.
The main event was Jay Lethal (who I adore) fighting Sammy Guevara (who is alright I guess) for the TNT Championship (which is a belt).