The Matrix

Date: September 10th, 2021

To say The Matrix had an influence on me would be an understatement.

The motif of humanRaCcoOn is a golden Matrix, my phone has a blue Matrix screensaver, my computer runs the Trinity theme which is based on The Matrix, I own a boxed copy of The Matrix Online and was even around for the beta testing phase before the game was officially launched. I'm based and blue pilled, bitch.

I feel disgust that society doesn't walk around in latex and engage in cyberpunk raves 24/7.

I hate the real world. I want to wake up.


I just peeped the trailer for the fourth Matrix movie and I'm excited as fuck. I don't care if it sucks. If it's The Matrix, I'll blindly love it. I'm obsessed. I'm like those weirdos who love Star Wars except with something cool.

Trinity is everything I want to be, minus the heterosexuality and lack of character development.

She's so cool when she's shutting the fuck up.

Morpheus is so wise and strong. The last time I spoke to a large, bald black man he just said "damn babygirl you beautiful" and tried to fuck me.

It was the UPS driver.

But it's my fault because I answered the door in my underwear.

The point is: I love The Matrix and I'm watching it right now to celebrate the return of our lord and savior Neo "Mr. Anderson" Neo. God speed.

Every time I see a bunny outside I get mad that it's not white. I'm waiting for my Matrix moment where I can follow the white rabbit and swallow some pills or whatever.

It reminds me of a story from when I was a kid, actually. I moved into this big house owned by a rich lady and she had moved all of her loser friends into it, each with their own rooms. So I got ushered up to meet some dude I'd never met before, who started talking to me about Pokemon. He was like "you like it right?" and I was like "yeah." "What about the games?" "Oh I never played those. I just like the show." Then he pulled out a copy of Pokemon Red and a copy of Pokemon Blue, and he said "you can have one of these. They're pretty much the same game, so I don't need two. Which one do you want?"

No joke, I picked Red. That's why I'm so woke now.

I relate hard to Mr. Anderson.

He's the most important human being in the world, yet he's stuck working a shit job for assholes who don't appreciate him. Just like me.

The Matrix is the greatest movie of all time, and if you don't believe me: fuck you.
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